Written by Mitch Cyrus

Mitch Cyrus
CrystalballTo understand how much of a behemoth “Iron Man 2” is, you just have to look at the box office receipts from last week.  Iron Man came in first with $128 million.  Second place was “A Nightmare on Elm Street” with $9 million.  When you earn 14 times as much as your closest competition, you’ve got a hit.

Look for that to continue this week, as I don’t think “Robin Hood” will take the #1 spot away from Robert Downey Jr. and company.

Mini Review

There is no mini review this week.  I was too busy spending almost 12 hours of my life watching some of the worst professional basketball I have ever seen.

I had an opportunity to finally catch several well regarded movies, but instead I chose to watch LeBron James show that he really doesn’t want to “Be Like Mike”, and another Mike, this one with the last name of Brown, show that he really doesn’t deserve to have the title “Head Coach” after his name.

I do know one thing…and that is that I will be avoiding watching E$PN for several days, as I have no desire to break my TV set by throwing a heavy object at some glib talking head of theirs blabbering on about LeBron’s “certain” move to New York, or one more montage of past Cleveland sports teams’ failures.

My Rating – Spergon Wynn (0 footballs)

News and Rumors

~ From Entertainment Weekly, I got the first bit of gossip regarding the upcoming season of one of my favorite shows, “Dexter”.  After last season’s shocking ending where Trinity murdered Rita, we were all wondering the fate of the children.  Turns out that Dexter’s sister Deb will help raise the three of them, which will be quite amusing given Deb’s “skill” with people.  Also, the cops don’t know that it was Trinity who murdered Rita, so initially they will do what all cops do; suspect the spouse.  Something to look forward to in January…especially if the Cavs are LeBronless (and nearly winless).

~ Sad to see that ABC is cancelling “Flash Forward”.   Upon recommendations from several on our boards, I had really gotten into this mind bender of a show, and was hoping it could serve as a long term replacement for “Lost” once it ends in a few weeks.  I’m interested in knowing how they wrap it up.  On the flip side, ABC has announced that they will be bringing “V” back for another season.

~ Oliver Stone has said that he could envision “Wall Street” being a trilogy.  So I am assuming that this means the end of “Wall Street 2: Money Never Sleeps” will be the kind that will leave the door wide open for a third.  Could be a great idea…could suck rotten eggs.  I’ll let you know in September when the movie is released.  I am on record on saying that I have high hopes for this one, based on previews and early buzz.

~ I am beginning to question Sam Worthington’s choice in accepting roles.  The man needs to mix in a serious drama or a comedy somewhere in between all his fantasy and sci-fi projects.  The latest has him playing legendary literary figure Allan Quatermain in a sci-fi version of the character, with Quatermain in the future, returning to a nearly dead Earth after years off-world.

~ Swerb will love this one; Naomi Watts has been tabbed for the starring role in a biopic of Marilyn Monroe, and will dive heavily into the more salacious aspects of her life.  As long as it includes a visualization of Marilyn’s Playboy layout, I’m good.

Stupid Remakes and Sequels

~ Shia LeBeouf is promising that Transformers 3 will not suck as bad as Transformers 2.  OK, what he really said was that the third one will be “more like the first one” in terms of more human interaction.  Yeah, and my dog won’t bite.  As long as Michael Bay is involved…it’s going to suck.  Deal with it.

~ Sylvester Stallone has said that he won’t be in another Rambo movie (yeah!), but that doesn’t mean that there won’t be another Rambo movie (boo!).  Seems the owner of the rights to the character have put up a “Rambo V” poster at the Cannes Movie Festival, but it’s not known if this is a lame attempt to lure Sly back (he says he absolutely won’t), or an indication that they are either going to “reboot” the franchise, or do something even dumber by putting someone else in the role and continuing it.

This week's new movie releases: 

Robin Hood

Starring: Russell Crowe, Cate Blanchet, Mark Strong

Plot :  The story of an expert archer who travels to the town of Nottingham toward the end of the 12th century, where the acts of a despotic sheriff and the presence of a beautiful widow inspire him to assemble a gang of mercenaries bent on raiding the upper class as a way to correct the sheriff's injustices.

View Trailer

The BeerBuzz: The critics are split right down the middle on this when it comes to “thumbs up” or “thumbs down”.  No one is calling it a great movie, though.  I like the concept in general of making a more gritty Robin Hood, but I’m not sure about the numerous liberties Ridley Scott has taken with the established mythology of Robin Hood.  Biggest is that in this tale, Robin is not nobility…he’s just a common soldier who comes home and then later pretends to be the Lord of Locksley (and husband to Maid Marion).  The other big plot change is that King Richard the Lionhearted is dead in this version…not just away fighting the Crusades.  One of my most hated movies was the way they butchered the entire Arthur legacy in the atrocious “First Knight”.  Will I think the same of this?  Stay tuned, the review will be out Monday or Tuesday.

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Letters to Juliet

Starring: Amanda Seyfried, Vanessa Redgrave, Christopher Egan

Plot :  A young woman on vacation in Verona, Italy finds an unanswered "letter to Juliet" -- one of thousands of missives left at the fictional lover's Verona courtyard. Inspired by the volunteers who respond to the notes, she goes on an adventure to unite the author of letter with her beloved.

View Trailer

The BeerBuzz: There are some movies that, when their trailers are released, immediately cause me to break out in a cold sweat in fear that my wife will insist on going with me to see.  Fortunately, the fear I had of this one was unfounded, as my wife is also convinced that this movie will be horrible.

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Just Wright

Starring: Queen Latifah, Common, Paula Patton

Plot :  A physical therapist falls for the basketball player she is helping recover from a career-threatening injury, though he's drawn to her best friend, who has her sights set on being an NBA trophy wife

View Trailer

The BeerBuzz: Those of us who were getting tortured watching the Cavs-Celtics series also got tortured by having to watch the preview of this suckfest over and over and over again, including all the scenes with Dwight Howard.  Even the studio knows that this movie has BOMB written all over it…they are only releasing it to 1,800 theaters.  If this movie grosses $15 million total, I’ll be surprised.

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New DVD Releases for Tuesday, May 18:

It is getting frustrating and difficult for me to write about DVD releases, now that the studios have worked out various deals where movies may be released as Blu Ray first, or may be released for sale but not for renting from Netflix, or may be released to Blockbuster and Pay-per-view, but not for the general public.

That said, when looking at these release dates, just know that these are the dates given to me to when a movie will first be released SOMEWHERE.  And if it’s not where YOU can get it on Tuesday, rest assured that it will come to your favorite manner of viewing sometime in the next few weeks.

Invictus  – I gave this movie 4 footballs, but I think that was too generous, as it really only deserves 3 ½.  That said, it is a very good movie, directed by Clint Eastwood and starring Morgan Freeman as Nelson Mandela in the unlikely but true story of the South African Rugby Team’s quest for the World Cup, held in South Africa shortly after the end of apartheid, when tensions were high and the country badly needed something to help in its unification.  Matt Damon also deserved his Best Supporting Actor nomination as team captain Francois Pienaar.

The Messenger  – Woody Harrelson reportedly does a wonderful job in this downer of a movie; following soldiers with the worst job in the world; notifying next-of-kin about the combat related deaths of their loved ones.  I’m looking forward to watching this (only once), but I get the feeling the tone is totally different from HBO’s beautiful film “Taking Chance”, which looks at the next stage; escorting the body home for burial.

Extreme Measures – A movie about a really rich couple who can afford to fund their own research team looking for a cure for their child’s rare, but always fatal disease.  They should have taken this film straight to the Lifetime network, rather than watch it bomb at the box office.  And what the hell has happened to Harrison Ford’s once shining career?

Valentine’s Day – Awful, awful, awful montage of “romantic” plots around Valentine’s Day…but it still pulled in over $100 million at the box office.  That’s a lot of guys willing to do anything to get lucky that night.

The Spy Next Door – Jackie Chan as a babysitter.  Yawn.  Just wait until next month, and you can see him exhibit the same lame acting skills in the same type of role with “The Karate Kid”.

Calendar Watch  

Next Week: Shrek Forever After, MacGruber

Upcoming Biggies (click on the hyperlink to view the available trailers).

Prince of Persia: The Sands of Time – May 28 – Might this finally be the first video game that translates to a huge hit at the box office?  Depends on whether or not you can buy Jake Gyllenhaal as an action hero.  Why not?  It worked for Tobey Maguire, Matt Damon, and Robert Downey Jr.

The A-Team – June 11 – Based on the campy TV series…but the makers of this film are trying to sell it more as an action film with no camp.  With Liam Neeson playing Hannibal Smith as their leader, they may have a chance.

Toy Story 3D – June 18 -  It looks like a big year for 3D films in 2010.  In this one, Buzz, Woody, and the rest of the toys are dumped into a day care after Andy grows up and goes to college.

The Twilight Saga: Eclipse – July 2 – More Wussy Vampires!  I can’t wait! (sorry…sarcasmectomy isn’t scheduled for a few months yet).

Inception – July 16 – Leonardo DiCaprio and Ellen Page in a Christopher Nolan sci-fi mind bender that looks to be in the mode of “Momento”

The Sorcerer’s Apprentice – July 16 – Live action remake of the Disney classic short, starring Nicolas Cage.

Salt – July 23 – Angelina Jolie as a CIA operative accused of being a Russian spy.

Wall Street 2: Money Never Sleeps – September 24 – Oliver Stone brings Michael Douglass back as Gordon Gecko, teaming him with Shia LaBeouf in a film that looks to be quite different in tone than the last one.

Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows: Part I – November 19 – Part One of the final book about Harry, Hermione, and Ron.  This one (and I’m sure the last one) will be in 3-D.

Tron Legacy – December 17 – Might be the most anticipated Holiday release of this year.