“Where’s Grady Sizemore?” “Who’s this guy?” “I don’t know who any of these guys are.” “The Dolans should sell to Gilbert.” These and other brilliant quips are things I have heard too many times at the ballpark this season. Along with blasting umpires, the flavor of the week for the national media has been to chastise Cleveland for its early season attendance figures. Yeah, they’re embarrassing. Yeah, Cleveland’s no longer the baseball town it was 12 years ago – that image we still attach ourselves to as if it’s from the recent past and not a distant memory. You know, when Clevelanders cared about baseball for seven or eight years after not caring in the slightest for, oh, about 30 years.
So, yeah, attendance sucks. But not as much as the people who are going to games yet don’t have a clue at what’s going on. You’re clearly not there for baseball. You’re there to bullshit about everything but baseball. You’re there to use baseball as an excuse to get together, pay a lot of money for beer, and sound like an ignorant dumbass. Hey, I’m glad that your ticket revenue is going to one of the organization’s many costs, but, for Christ sake, please get somewhat informed before you show up. It takes watching ONE game on television to realize that Grady Sizemore is no longer on the team. Frankly, it takes barely paying attention over the last year and a half to figure out what has happened to Sizemore.
Who’s that guy? He’s our second baseman Jason Kipnis. He’s actually been around for a while. Who’s that guy? He’s our center fielder Michael Bourn, one of our prized free agent signings by our cheap ass owner. Who’s that guy? Mark Reynolds? Oh yeah. He’s the guy who strikes out a lot. Stupid signing.
I don’t know what’s worse about Cleveland baseball fans – physical attendance or mental attendance.
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