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Indians Indians Archive The B-List: 6/8
Written by Steve Buffum

Steve Buffum
Buff says it all in his intro to today's B-List: "Apologies in advance for the brevity of the list today, but frankly, how much can one say about a game like that? I supposed I could give Roget a workout looking for synonyms of 'suck.'"
Apologies in advance for the brevity of the list today, but frankly, how much can one say about a game like that?  I supposed I could give Roget a workout looking for synonyms of "suck."

1) Department of Corrections Department

Loyal reader Brian Hodgett points out that yesterday's description of Aaron Boone being thrown out on a double steal was incorrect.  This means that any second-guessing about the strategy of executing a double steal at that point is rendered inert and I apologize to all involved.

However, Boone was actually caught off base on the other "Pitcher Fake Delivery That Never Ever Works Ever On Anyone Ever," ratcheting the Bad Baserunning Coefficient up approximately one million percent.  Since this is the second time a Cleveland runner has been caught with such a move, the BBC is actually increased by roughly one billion percent.  I am no longer satisfied with anything short of Total Immolation when it comes to dealing with the parties responsible for this team's baserunning "prowess," where "prowess" is in quotation marks in much the same way you would describe Ken Lay's "ethics."

2) A case of mistaken identity

It was Esteban Loaiza.  ESTEBAN LOAIZA.  It was not Walter Johnson.  It was not Randy Johnson.  It was not Lyndon Johnson.  (Admittedly, LBJ was not a formidable pitcher, but it would have been unnerving to see him out there, since he's relatively dead: I could excuse a poor performance in that case.)  It was Esteban Expletive Loaiza, the post-Yankee version, the version with the nine-hundred ERA with the 4 MPH fastball.

How hard did Loaiza have to work?  Consider that he threw 77 pitches in 7 innings.  Until giving up two hits (one a home run) in the 7th (and who wouldn't run out of gas after 65 pitches against the Mighty Tribe?), he gave up two hits, one walk, and K'd 4 through 6 scoreless innings.  The Indians only stranded one runner in scoring position against Loaiza, because they barely had any baserunners in the first place.

Some days you just don't have it.  Hey, Tim Laker was in the lineup (a reasonable thing, day game after a night game and all).  Some days the opposing pitcher is locked in and uses his superior stuff to baffle the ...

No.  It was Esteban Loaiza, fer crine out loud.  That's just poor.

3) And now, on the high wire, Jason Wallenda!

For a guy under the microscope, Jason Johnson actually gave the Indians exactly the kind of boostish outing you hope your fifth starter can deliver: 7 innings, 3 runs.  Heck, if not for a wild pitch, it was only 2 runs (it was 2 through 6 in any event).  You ought to win a game like that.  Johnson took inspiration from Jake Westbrook's last outing, inducing 15 ground ball outs (to 3 flies and 3 Ks) and 3 double plays (2 by ex-Tribe farmhand Marcos Scutaro).  So he gave up 11 hits, walked a guy, hit another, and had one hitless inning.  You want pretty, go to the Louvre.  Can't pin this one on Johnson.

4) Natural consequences

Ben Broussard is on a 7-game hitting streak.  During this streak, he is hitting .500 (15-for-30) with 4 HRs.  There is no hotter hitter on the roster.  He hit the home run against Loaiza in the 7th for Cleveland's only run to that point.  If there are runners on base and a right-hander on the mound, you want Ben Broussard at the plate.

After a pinch-hit single by Victor Martinez and a smashed double by Travis Hafner, Broussard faced Huston Street with men on 2nd and 3rd ... and promptly K'd.

What an Indian.

5) Nice hose!

An outfield assist from Blake this time, catching Swisher trying to take an extra base.

6) Silver Lining Dept.

Carmona picked a guy (Jason Kendall) off.  Had he not given up 4 hits and a run in two innings, this would be more impressive.

We turned three double plays.

Jhonny Peralta did not impale himself on his bat handle.

7) Please tell me it is true

I have heard an unsubstantiated report that Scott Sauerbeck has been DFW'd (designated for getting the wazoo) and that Rafael Perez has been called up to give us a left-hander in the 'pen for the second time this season.  I am all for this.  (I demand this.)  Thus far, there is no report as to whether Guillermo Mota has been complaining of stomach pains from all the pins in his voodoo doll.

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