Written by Steve Buffum

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The Cleveland Indians are 8-4 against the Chicago White Sox.  They are 18-40 against the Not Chicago White Sox.  Because they played Philadelphia, which is steadfastly not the Chicago White Sox, the Indians had a better than 2-in-3 chance of losing last night.  So they did.  The Cleveland Indians came into the game with a 4-9 record against the National League.  Philadephia is in the National League, so the Indians had a better than 2-in-3 chance of losing from a different perspective.  In this case, perspective is irrelevant.  They could only lose once.  So they did. 

FINAL	1	2	3	4	5	6	7	8	9	R	H	E
Indians (26-44)	2	0	1	0	2	0	0	0	1	6	11	0
Phillies (37-32)	1	1	0	2	0	0	1	0	2	7	11	2

W: J. Romero (1-0)                    L: Wood (1-3) 

I would ask for a moment of silence for Italy’s World Cup squad, but I don’t believe the sound of vuvuzelas will be leaving my head until August at the earliest.  Also, I have three children. 

0) Go read this 

http://www.guardian.co.uk/sport/2010/jun/23/wimbledon-2010-tennis-live 

Start reading at the 3.45pm mark. 

You’re welcome. 

1) Feigning interest

Boy, that Jake Westbrook, huh?  What a mensch!  Westbrook pitched last night, and boy … um … yeah, y’know, I got nothin’.  He gave up 3 extra-base hits, but two of them came off the bat of a guy who’s slugging .563.  He gave up 7 hits in 5 innings, which isn’t very good, but it’s not too bad.  He gave up a homer, but it was a solo shot.  He walked a guy, but it was intentional, walking the #8 hitter to get to the pitcher, who’s hitting .045/.045/.045, and the pitcher made the third out.

Essentially, Westbrook had one Moment of Truth and failed: pitching to Raul Ibanez with runners on 2^nd and 3^rd with one out, Westbrook challenged Ibanez (hitting a weak .246/.337/.402 on the season, not a bad approach) and failed (2-run double).  The Indians lost by one run. 

(Of course, I think they were capable of giving up as many runs as it took to lose, but Jake still drank from a Bucket of Fail on that one.)

2) Smash-Soo Choo! 

"I talked to the hitting coach before the game because I hadn't hit a homer in two weeks," Choo said. "The balls fly out of here." 

Okay, putting aside the snarky comments wondering about the frequency with which Choo talks to the hitting coach, Citizens Bank Bandbox is certainly a good place to take a home run approach to hitting.  Choo certainly has done his homework there. 

It took a while for this to bear fruit, though, as Choo required FOUR pitches to hit a home run in the first to stake Cleveland to a 2-0 lead that they would not relinquish for several innings.  And then, after falling behind 4-3, Choo hit a second two-run homer to give the Tribe a short-lived 5-4 lead that they would cough up with tremendous esprit d’corps. 

Anyway, Choo hit two homers and drove in 4 runs.  And yes, it still counts despite hitting them off Kyle Kendrick in a bandbox.  (The homers were listed at 417 and 412 feet, so it’s not like Choo hit any glorified popups or anything.) 

3) Head of the class

The primary job of the leadoff man is to Get On Base.  This is why we measure the quality of a leadoff man by his OBP first and Everything Else second. 

But, of course, we actually want him to score runs.  It’s just that unless you’re going to have a 100-homer guy leading off, Getting On Base is more often than not a precursor to scoring runs. 

So it is nice to note that Trevor Crowe reached base four times on three hits and an error … and scored 4 runs.  I mean, the Indians scored 6 runs: two were Shin-Soos Choo on homers, and the other four were Trevors Crowe. 

Crowe actually showed a bit of pop off Kendrick, hitting a pair of doubles to go with a single and the error.  It will be a while before I take Crowe seriously as a long-term solution, but according to the Posnanski Treatise, this is exactly what we should be doing, and to his credit, Crowe is doing something with the opportunity. 

4) Stick-to-it-ive-ness 

After a leadoff double, Luis Valbuena was sacrificed to third, and Travis Hafner was sent in to pinch-hit for Jake Westbrook.  Westbrook is actually not a wholly useless hitter, but this was a prudent move that simply didn’t work out (Hafner grounded to third on his first pitch and the run didn’t score).  Still, this ended Westbrook’s night after 5 innings and 75 pitches and a reliever was required. 

Admit it: when Tony Sipp  gave up singles to the first two hitters to put runners at 1^st and 2^nd, you said to yourself, “Great googly moogly, Tony Sipp can no more pitch than he can fly to Phobos!” 

But a funny thing happened: Sipp didn’t panic, and got Raul Ibanez to ground into a double play.  So now there is only one runner on third and two outs.

 Sipp promptly walked the next hitter on five pitches, and once more, refrains to the effect of “Same Old Tony Sipp” came to the fore. 

But an even funnier thing happened: Sipp picked Shane Victorino off first.  Well, actually, he caught Victorino OFF first, and Victorino cleverly got into a rundown in an effort to allow Ryan Howard to score from third.  However, the Cleveland defense actually came through, throwing him to catch Howard for the third out, and Sipp had completed a scoreless inning. 

Look, is it Shiny Happy Time when Tony Sipp strides to the mound?  It is not.  He allowed three baserunners and was extraordinarily lucky to escape unscathed.  But given a chance to work out of a jam of his own making, he did, in fact, work out of it.

5) A moment of silence 

Here we pause to contemplate the vision of Ryan Howard bearing down on you in an effort to score a run during a rundown between first and second, and say a prayer for Carlos Santana’s colon, which is likely in bad shape today. 

6) Dept. of Not Surprise 

Joe Smiff was recalled to temporarily take the place of David Huff, giving the Indians an extra bullpen pitcher until a starter is needed this weekend. 

He walked the only batter he faced, showing that he is right back to the early-season form we remembered. 

7) Dept. of Ineffectual Schmoes 

Frank Herrmann gave up a solo shot to Brian Schneider.  Brian Schneider has now hit more home runs this season off Frank Herrmann than any other human being, alive or dead.  (He’s Brian Schneider!)

Raffy Perez posted a sterling 1-to-1 out-to-walk ratio. 

8) Our super shutdown closer does the job! 

Yes, Chris Perez faced two batters in the 8^th inning and retired them both, throwing 5 strikes in 6 pitches.  I am looking forward for more super shutdowning from Mr. Perez, clearly our super shutdown closer. 

9) Our ACTUAL closer … no so much 

Kerry Wood recorded an out in the 9^th inning.  Trade for him now, while you still have the chance!  Hurry!  Supplies are limited!

10) Sotto voce 

It is one thing to give up a walkoff homer to Jimmy Rollins.  Jimmy Rollins is a fine baseball player, and will hit home runs in the Bandbox off virtually any pitcher.

 But to have this be the game-winning hit because you WALKED BRIAN SCHNEIDER … he’s Brian Schneider!  Throw strikes! 

11) Ducks on the Pond!

The Indians went 2-for-11 with runners in scoring position, although they did have a sacrifice fly as well.

One hit was Choo’s first-inning homer. 

One hit was a single by Jhonny Peralta which allowed Carlos Santana to be … thrown out at home on an excellent throw by Raul Ibanez. 

The Indians left only 8 men on base because Shin-Soo Choo was caught stealing. 

12) Hey, we had one of those! 

Congratulations to Danys Baez, who is still in the league and recorded an out last night.