Written by Mitch Cyrus

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Mitch gives his weekly take on the movies hitting the theaters, as well as DVD this weekend. In the event you're looking for a good flick to go see or rent this weekend, let The Crystal Ball be your guide.

There is an elephant sleeping in the room regarding this week’s releases, so let’s skip the frivolities and get right to it. 

Title: United 93 

Starring: David Alan Basche, Olivia Thirlby, Liza Colon-Zayas 

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Plot:  Depiction of the one highjacked plane on 9/11 that didn’t strike its intended target. 

The BeerBuzz:  Neither DJK nor I will be reviewing this film.  We’ve discussed it, and it’s just too soon, which is a feeling I think most of the country will have.  There wasn’t a movie specifically about the bombing of Pearl Harbor until 1970’s “Tora, Tora, Tora!” (not counting a documentary from John  Ford entitled “December 7^th” released in 1943).  There has never been a movie depicting the entire events surrounding the Oklahoma City bombing…just one TV movie in 1998 about one of the survivors.  

I question whether people are ready for this and are wanting to go into a theatre and relive these horrible events, fully knowing how it turns out.  Yes, plenty of WWII films were released between 1942 and 1945 that referenced Pearl Harbor.  But those were films designed to act both as news, and as needed propaganda to prop up the war effort.  This is different.  We’ve seen the events time and time again on television, and it’s also a reminder that things are still very , very insecure in that regard. 

For those of you that might still want to take a chance and go, I’ve done something I’ve never done for a Crystal Ball report before…I’ve actually scanned numerous reviews to get an idea of how good of a film it is…and it looks to be an excellent one.  It appears that the British director Paul Greengrass has struck a perfect balance between dramatic fiction and the facts, and has handled it delicately and with the proper decorum and respect. 

If you are on the fence, wanting to see it if it is a good movie, but not wanting to be both depressed and disappointed…then my thoughts are that you should probably go. 

I will get around to seeing it someday…but not in the immediate future. 

And now, back to our regularly scheduled snideness and snarkyness. 


Title: RV 

Starring: Robin Williams, Cheryl Hines, Kristen Chenoweth

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Plot:  Stupid, zany Dad rents an R.V. the size of a battleship and takes his dysfunctional family on a trip to the Rockies. 

The BeerBuzz:  If ever there has been a case of me going from the sublime to the ridiculous, it’s right here with the first two movies I’m previewing.  Barry Sonnenfeld once directed two great flicks in row with “Get Shorty” and “Men In Black”.  Since then, he’s given us “Wild Wild West”, “Men In Black 2”, and “Big Trouble”.  Combine this with one of those over the top “Robin Williams as an idiot” performances like we saw in “Flubber” and “Father’s Day”, and you end up with something I wouldn’t watch at gunpoint. 
 

Title: Stick It 

Starring: Missy Peregrym, Jeff Bridges, Vanessa Lengies 

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Plot:  A juvenile delinquent is sentenced to return to the gymnastics school.  Conflicts arise because while she once was a champion level competitor, she quit before The Big Match. 

The BeerBuzz:  I guess this is supposed to be for gymnastics what “Bring It On” was for cheerleading.  But according to my sister, who is at near stage mother maniacal fanaticism concerning it, gymnastics is far, far superior in regards to athletic skill (and if you don’t believer her, my nine year old niece will do a round off into your face).   Whatever.  From the previews, it looks like your standard “troubled teen comes back and teaches the uptight kids and parents to lighten up”.  It also looks like she introduces pole dancing techniques to gymnastics…which is a little creepy considering the age of most of the girls. 
 

Title: Akeelah and the Bee 

Starring: Laurence Fishburne, Angela Bassett, Keke Palmer 

View Trailer 

Plot:  A gifted young girl from the projects of south Los Angeles trains for the National Spelling Bee under the tutelage of a reclusive professor. 

The BeerBuzz:  “The Search for Bobby Fischer” meets “Finding Forester” meets “Bee Season”.  OK, I picked on the White Version (Richard Gere’s “Bee Season”) a few weeks back…so this one gets the same joke. 

If you’re the type that gets all agog when ESPN televises the spelling bees, get yourself to the theatre to watch this…and then get yourself a friggin’ life.


New DVD Releases on Tuesday, May 2nd 

The Family Stone – Warning!  Warning, Will Robinson!  Dangerous toxic Estrogen ahead!  Ah yes, the old “let’s take the girlfriend/boyfriend to see the wacky family” chestnut.  Major Chick Flick of the Week, but probably one most guys can tolerate. 

Hoodwinked – Animated kids film with a twist.  Kind of an “Aesop’s Fracture Fairy Tales” on steroids. 

Last Holiday – Queen Latifah plays a woman who is told she has only three or four weeks to live, so she cashes in her 401(k) and goes wild and crazy in the Czech Republic…certainly my personal choice for paradise.  Actually a pretty well reviewed movie as an amusing and not insulting light comedy. 

A Streetcar Named Desire, Night of the Iguana, Sweet Bird of Youth, and Baby Doll – A plethora of Tennessee Williams classic films for the true movie fanatic. 
 

Calendar Watch:

Next week: Mission Impossible III, Hoot, An American Haunting 

The Upcoming Biggies: 

Poseidon:  May 12^th 

The DaVinci Code: May 19^th 

X-Men: The Last Stand:  May 26^th 

Click: June 23^rd 

Superman Returns: June 30^th 

Pirates of the Caribbean: Dead Man’s Chest: July 7^th 

Miami Vice: July 29^th 

Snakes On a Plane!: August 18^th  

Casino Royale (007): November 17th

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Posted by Mitch Cyrus Apr 27, 2006 7:00 PM