Written by Mitch Cyrus

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Well, well, well. It seems that maybe the movie going public actually DOES have a little bit of sense every now and then; as they have turned their collective backs upon the idiocy that has been Tom Cruise

Well, well, well.  It seems that maybe the movie going public actually DOES have a little bit of sense every now and then; as they have turned their collective backs upon the idiocy that has been Tom Cruise’s behavior for the past 18 months.  “Mission Impossible: III” pulled in only 2/3^rd the box office as the last installment, and is setting itself up as the first major disappointment of the summer, although it is doubtful it will qualify as a bomb. 

Only two new releases this week, as distributors of the smaller films prefer not to get swallowed up in the wake of the major releases. 


Title: Poseidon 

Starring: Kurt Russell, Josh Lucas, Richard Dreyfus, Emmy Rossum 

View Trailer 

Plot:  Remake of the 70s disaster classic of an ocean liner capsized by a tidal wave. 

The BeerBuzz:  When director Wolfgang Petersen is around water, such as “Das Boot” and “The Perfect Storm”, he makes great movies…although it’s always risky doing a remake.  Smartly, they’ve chosen to completely change the characters around, so we’re not seeing Gene Hackman’s defrocked priest, Ernest Borgnine’s NY cop, or Red Button’s…whatever the hell he was.  Instead we have Russell as an Important Person (judge or mayor), unaware that his daughter (Rossum) is engaged; Lucas as a gambler, and Dreyfus as a gay architect contemplating suicide prior to the disaster.  Avoiding a Shelly Winters clone is great (I guess Roseanne Barr was busy)…now hopefully they’ll also avoid that damn obnoxious little know-it-all kid they had in the first one as well. 

Better than anything…there’s an ocean liner sinking, and no friggin’ Leonardo DeCaprio! 

Don’t be expecting much more than that in regard to plot…this looks to be more of an action thrill ride than character study.  I’ll let you know sometime next week, as I’ll be reviewing this film. 
 

Title: Just My Luck 

Starring: Lindsay Lohan, Chris Pine 

View Trailer 

Plot:  A Manhattanite known as “the luckiest woman in the world” has a chance encounter with a down and out young man, and suddenly both of their lives change. 

The BeerBuzz:  Gag.  Freaky Friday Redux.  Drop the tweens off, then go hit the bar for ninety minutes…do NOT risk going in with them.  Rumors abound that Lohan was too busy partying her ass off in New Orleans while filming, and that it shows in her acting.  To which I say, “she’s ACTED before?”  It will be Just Your BAD Luck if you’re stuck watching this. 
 

New DVD Releases on Tuesday, May 16th 

The Producers – The film version of the mega-hit Broadway musical that was based off a Mel Brooks movie, including the two leads, Matthew Broderick and Nathan Lane.  Can’t miss, right?  Wrong.  All the fun and spontaneity found in the stage performances are totally lost in the screen production.  Casting the one-note talent Will Farrell as the Hitler loving playwright didn’t help. 

Something New – Above average flick about a black career woman unexpectedly falling in love with a white landscaper. 

Doogal – Animated kid flick of the week…and about the only animated film released in the past six months that absolutely tanked at the box office.  Whoopi Goldberg and Jon Stewart headline the voices in this British made fable of a noble dog and his friends trying to thwart the plans of an evil sorcerer.  Lord of the Rings Lite, I guess. 

When a Stranger Calls – Remake of the horror flick about a teenager receiving threatening calls from within the house.  What’s the big deal?…our 18 year old gets that all the time, as we’ll actually call up his cell phone from our living room to tell him to turn that damn stereo down or die. 

Con Air (Unrated Extended Version) – Just what I need…a re-introduction to some people of the character Cyrus the Virus.  Oh well, another three months of listening to idiots telling me about it as if they’ve come up with something completely original.  Time to double check the batteries on the taser.  Oh…as far as the movie goes…great flick…not sure what qualifies as “unrated extended”, but it might have something to do with Steve Buscemi’s creepy character. 

Crimson Tide (Unrated Director’s Cut) – Another great film to catch again.  Good thing, as all the new ones suck.  Again, not sure what would really cause it to be qualified as “unrated”.  Just as long as the drama and snappy dialog between Denzell Washington and Gene Hackman remain. 
 

Calendar Watch:

Next week: The Da Vinci Code, Over the Hedge, See No Evil 

The Upcoming Biggies: 

X-Men: The Last Stand:  May 26^th 

The Breakup:  June 2nd 

Prairie Home Companion: June 9^th 

Click: June 23^rd 

Superman Returns: June 30^th 

Pirates of the Caribbean: Dead Man’s Chest: July 7^th 

Miami Vice: July 29^th 

Snakes On a Plane!: August 18^th  

Casino Royale (007): November 17th

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Posted by Mitch Cyrus May 11, 2006 7:00 PM