Written by Mitch Cyrus

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If it's Friday, it's time for the Crystal Ball. In this weekly column, Mitch looks at all the new releases for the weekend at the theaters and on DVD. In addition, he brings us up to speed on the latest Hollywood news and gossip, as well as some of the major projects on the calendar for the next 3-4 months.

The best thing about how well “The DaVinci Code” did at the box office?  That fact that I no longer have to listen to those stupid damned “Mission: Impossible” commercials that crow about it being “The Number One Movie In America”.  Right.  And after two weeks, it can’t even beat out animated kids’ flick about a talking raccoon. 

Well, I wonder what may be #1 next week?  Only one new flick being released nationwide this week.  “X-Men: The Last Stand”.  I’m not sure if people will really want to watch a movie about striking sex film workers, but…what?...oh…nevermind. 

Three day weekend…so look for X-Men to draw in well over $100 million by the time the holiday weekend end. 

News and Gossip: 

~ Bruce Willis has confirmed that they are about to start shooting Die Hard 4.  They’ve had to scrap the original script, as it called for an oil tanker near New Orleans to explode and send waves into the city.  Oops.  As long as it’s been since the first one, any chance that a plotline may involve John McClane saving his grandkids? 

~ Joan Cusack will star a movie about cooking mogul Julia Child.  Why??????  Can “Iron Chef: The Movie” be far behind? (one can only pray). 

~ British stars Colin Farrell and Ewan McGregor will play criminal brothers in an upcoming Woody Allen film.  Hopefully now that Woody’s gotten the hell out of New York for filming, the success he had with “Match Point” will continue.  The chances for success will also increase if Woody never acts again. 

~I don’t like biographies, but this one might be interesting.  A movie will be filmed about Bob Dylan, titled “I’m not there”.  Heath Ledger is to be one of several actors representing different aspects of Dylan’s life story and music.  Others committed to the project include Cate Blanchett, Christian Bale, Julianne Moore, Michelle Williams and Richard Gere 

~And finally, let’s hear it for the British Justice System!  The Lunatic Formerly Known As Tom Cruise has lost his court battle to stop the UK airing of the “South Park” episode with Tom hiding in the closet.  Now if only Tom could stand really, really close to Kenny next time he’s killed… 
 

This week’s new release: 
 

Title: X-Men: The Last Stand 

Starring: Hugh Jackman, Patrick Stewart, Ian McKellen, and Halle Berry 
 

Plot:  War is coming between good and evil mutants after the government announces a “cure” for the mutant gene.  Said to be the last X-Men movie…at least the last of this arc of three.  Jackman is “95%” sure he’ll do a Wolverine movie next. 

The BeerBuzz:  Hell, there probably aren’t many people who haven’t heard all the buzz about this one.  No Nightcrawler in this one, but we do get Angel, the Beast (Kelsey Grammar), Colossus, and Shadowcat on the Good Guys’ team…and British tough-guy favorite Vinnie Jones (a former bad boy of soccer) playing Juggernaut. This movie, Superman Returns, and Pirates of the Caribbean 2 will undoubtedly be the top three box office champions of 2006…the only thing I’m not sure of yet is the order. 
 

New DVD Releases on Tuesday, May 30^th  

Date Movie – To re-issue my statement on The Crystal Ball when this was released to the theaters; “The tag line goes: ‘From 2 of the 6 Guys that brought you Scary Movie’.  My guess is that they were the two that sat in the corner making fart jokes while the other four were working”. 

Freedomland – On pace to be one of the biggest bombs for a movie featuring major stars.  Julianne Moore and Morgan Freeman star in this mess of a film about a woman who claims her child was still inside her car when it was carjacked.  There was a reason this film only pulled in $12 million at the box office...it stunk. 

Joey – The Complete First Season – Anyone buying this needs to be immediately bitch slapped. 

Platoon (20^th Anniversary Edition) – Has it really been 20 years since this great flick was made?  Looking at Charlie Sheen then, and how he looks now…maybe there is something to be said for constantly binging on cocaine, booze, and hookers. 
 

Calendar Watch:

Next week: The Break Up, The Omen (June 6^th) 

The Upcoming Biggies: 

Cars: June 9^th  

Prairie Home Companion: June 9^th 

Click: June 23^rd 

Superman Returns: June 30^th 

Pirates of the Caribbean: Dead Man’s Chest: July 7^th 

M. Knight Shyamalan’s Lady in the Water: July 21^st  

Miami Vice: July 29^th 

World Trade Center: August 9^th  

Snakes On a Plane!: August 18^th  

Clerks II: August 18^th  

All the King’s Men: September 22^nd   

Flags of Our Fathers: October 20^th   

Casino Royale (007): November 17^th

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Posted by Mitch Cyrus May 25, 2006 7:00 PM