The Crystal Ball - Feb 17 Releases

Written by Mitch Cyrus

Upcoming movies details, including my totally non-scientific guess of how badly they’ll really suck.

Like football prognostications, I totally reserve the right to be 100% wrong on any (and possibly all) of my early guestimates.

Only three nationwide releases this week, and my guess is that Date Movie will emerge #1 next week. The Pink Panther won the box office #1 spot for last week, one in which all four new movies were trashed by critics…pretty typical for February.

Title: Freedomland

Release Date: February 17

Starring: Julianne Moore, Samuel L. Jackson, Edie Falco

Plot: When her child disappears, Moore blames a homeless African-American man, setting off controversy in the community. Freeman and Falco play a detective and reporter, respectively, working on a case that is becoming more bizarre by the moment.

The BeerBuzz: Hey! Let’s put Julianne Moore in a movie as a mother freaked out about a missing child, and hope no one remembers “The Forgotten” (I think most people forgot to go see it). Loosely based on the story of Susan Smith, and I’m hoping it is VERY loosely, as we all know what happened with that wacko. On one hand, I’m concerned as director Joe Roth’s last two movies, “Christmas With the Kranks” and “America’s Sweethearts” blew large chunks. On the other; I like the idea of teaming Jackson and Falco together.

Title: Eight Below

Release Date: February 17

Starring: Paul Walker, Jason Biggs, Bruce Greenwood

Plot: Brutal weather forces Antarctic explorers to leave their sled dogs behind and fight for survival, and then fight to go BACK into that crap and rescue the dogs.

The BeerBuzz: I’m there. I saw the promos in The Disney Store while shelling out waayyyy too much money for some cheap-assed Disney merchandise for my nine year old niece, and I was hooked. Now understand, my two dogs are the most spoiled creatures on the face of this planet, and any weepy “save the dogs” movie is going to have me hook, line, and sinker. On a side note; the odds are 100:1 that at least seven of the dogs are better actors than Walker.

Title: Date Movie

Release Date: February 17

Starring: Alyson Hannigan, Adam Campbell, Fred Willard

Plot: Those wacky and tasteless “Scary Movie” doods try the same treatment to romantic comedies.

The BeerBuzz: The tag line goes: “From 2 of the 6 Guys that brought you Scary Movie”. My guess is that they were the two that sat in the corner making fart jokes while the other four were working. It will probably bring in big bucks this weekend as teenage boys everywhere use this as their date movie for the Valentine’s weekend. And then next weekend it will gross $3,492.76

New DVD Releases on Tuesday, February 21st.

North Country – A chance to see Charlize Theron’s Oscar nominated performance in the same type of role Sally Fields won with in Norma Rae. Anything to make us forget Aeon Flux

Rent – I’m not sure I can watch this now with a straight face after it was savaged so amusingly in Team America: World Police…but I get the feeling that the same woman who had me sit through Chicago and Phantom of the Opera will insist. It will probably go down much smoother with an 18 pack.

The Weather Man – Once upon a time, Nicolas Cage won an Oscar for Best Actor. It’s hard remembering that while watching this downer.

Domino – I may end up having to rent this just to see if Tony Scott’s twisted interpretation of the life of former model/bounty hunter Domino Harvey is really as bad as what they say. (Laurence Harvey from the original “The Manchurian Candidate” was her father).

All the President’s Men – This classic will be my purchase of the week.

Midnight Cowboy: Collector’s Edition – This movie just never did anything for me…but I do realize other critics viewed it as a great film.

Posted by Mitch Cyrus Feb 17, 2006 7:00 PM

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The Crystal Ball - Feb 17 Releases

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