Written by Jesse Lamovsky

---

The most surprising development in Ohio State’s 27-22 victory over Toledo last Saturday afternoon might not have been the closeness of the final score, or anything else that happened between the white lines at the Horseshoe. The most surprising development might have been what didn’t happen.

After throwing for 130 yards and a touchdown in a half’s work in the opening rout of Akron, heralded freshman Braxton Miller took as many snaps against Toledo as Yours Truly did- zero. Joe Bauserman started the entire game at quarterback. And Joe Bauserman, well… ineffectual is a nice way of describing his performance. His numbers weren’t bad- 16-of-30, 189 yards and a touchdown- but they don’t do justice to now overpoweringly mediocre he was. Time and time again Bauserman either missed open receivers by a mile- such as Devin Smith on what would have been a forty-yard touchdown in the first half- or, failing to make anything happen, simply threw the ball far, far out of bounds.

Under the circumstances- Bauserman struggling, the offense limping along without spark or inspiration- one wonders why Miller didn’t see the field at all on Saturday, let alone a little bit. The answer to that question likely lay in the number of turnovers Bauserman committed- zero. The senior quarterback took no chances, forced nothing, and although he made precious few plays, he avoided the mistake that likely would have killed the Buckeyes in this tight football game. I don’t think Luke Fickell trusted a true freshman in a game like this, a game in which one carelessly thrown pass, one ball held out like a loaf of bread, might have made the difference.

This is not me defending Luke Fickell’s decision to keep Joe Bauserman in the game. It’s my interpretation of what his thought process was.

So much for what I think Fickell thinks. Here’s what I think: I think Joe Bauserman will continue to get the lion’s share of the snaps until he fails, abjectly. Until he has a Todd Boeckman-at-USC type of pratfall, he’s going to stay in the starting lineup and Braxton Miller will spend most of his time on the sidelines. I don’t believe Coach Fickell will start the freshman until he absolutely has to. This puts Ohio State fans in an awkward position. Most want to see Braxton Miller play- but they also want the Buckeyes to succeed. Yet the only way they will see Braxton Miller play is if the Buckeyes fail. That’s the situation we’re in.

   

Game of the Week- Michigan/Notre Dame: I’ll admit it’s with no small amount of reluctance that I anoint this my Game of the Week. Yes, this game was chock-full of drama and excitement, particularly in the wild fourth quarter. Yes, the ending- three lead changes in the final minute-and-a-half- was stunning. Yes, this is the third consecutive Michigan-Notre Dame tilt to be decided inside the last thirty seconds. Yes, it was one hell of a football game.

But it was also one hell of a poorly played football game.  The defensive lapses in the final minute- with both teams allowing receivers to get wide-open deep when they should have kept everything in front of them as a matter of course- were shocking, even considering the participants. This wasn’t a case of quarterbacks putting together gut-check drives in the face of stout, determined opposition. This was a case of defenses, frankly, shitting the bed. The fantastic finish would never have happened had either Michigan or Notre Dame played fundamentally sound football.

And for a second straight week Notre Dame was absolutely atrocious when it mattered. A week after committing five turnovers against South Florida, the Irish coughed it up four more times, including two more turnovers inside the opponents’ red zone. They suffered a complete meltdown defensively down the stretch, allowing a whopping 322 total yards in the last seventeen minutes. After retaking the lead with thirty seconds left they somehow allowed a 64-yard catch-and-run to set up Michigan’s game-winning touchdown. It was an awful performance, one typical for what is becoming a nightmare season in South Bend.  

Player of the Week- Melvin Ingram, South Carolina: A lot of defensive linemen go their entire careers, high school, college and pro, without scoring a single touchdown. Melvin Ingram scored two in one game last Saturday against Georgia- and they proved the difference in South Carolina’s 45-42 win over the Bulldogs. Ingram got his first score in the second quarter when he took a handoff on a fake punt and rumbled 68 yards, breaking a couple of tackles along the way. Two periods later Ingram scooped up an Aaron Murray fumble and raced three yards for the clinching score.

Word of the Week: It’s “tragedy” as related to September 11. Newsflash- September 11 was not a “tragedy.” A hurricane is a tragedy. A flood is a tragedy. Something terrible for which no one can be blamed- a natural disaster, a disease striking a person down in the prime of life- is a tragedy. Mass murder is not a “tragedy.” A tragedy has victims without perpetrators. September 11 had perpetrators. Thank you.

Mario Party: Not long ago Florida International was one of the worst programs in all of FBS football- if not the worst. In 2006-07 the Panthers lost twenty-three consecutive games. Their only claim to fame- other than being terrible- was their participation in the infamous Miami-FIU brawl during the 2006 season.

But those days are long gone down in Miami, thanks in large part to head coach Mario Cristobal. The forty-year old Cristobal, once a standout tackle for the cross-town Hurricanes, has completely turned the FIU program around. In 2010 he led the Panthers to a surprise Sun Belt Conference championship and a win in the Little Caesar’s Bowl, and he- and his program- are proving that last season was no fluke. FIU is now 2-0 after stunning Louisville on the road last Friday night. Cristobal has upgraded the talent big-time with athletes like senior receiver T.Y. Hilton, who torched the Cardinals with 201 receiving yards and two touchdowns.

Just a few years ago the Panthers couldn’t win a game to save their lives. Now they’re 9-2 in their last eleven going into a gigantic Saturday night home date against powerful Central Florida. It’s only been a few years, but that twenty-three game losing streak, and that disastrous night in the old Orange Bowl, seem like a lifetime ago for this rising program- and its rising young coach.   

Nice Scheduling: These should be relatively happy times for Eastern Michigan’s football program. After going 2-22 over the last two seasons (including an eighteen-game losing streak,) the Artists Formerly Known as the Hurons perfect in 2011, with two consecutive wins right out of the gate. Should it be time to start a push to get Ron English some national coach-of-the-year recognition?

Well… no. It isn’t as if the Eagles are improved, although it is a remote possibility. It’s that they’ve played the weakest schedule in major-college football thus far- and it isn’t even close. Eastern’s first two opponents are Howard out of the Mid-Eastern Athletic Conference and Alabama State out of the Southwestern Athletic Conference. Both are FCS programs from perhaps the two worst conferences in that division. Howard is 5-30 since 2008; Alabama State suffered through four straight losing seasons before going 7-5 under former Jacksonville Jaguar Reggie Barlow last season. The Eagles blasted Howard 41-9 but didn’t exactly look overpowering in a 14-7 triumph over the Hornets.

In other words, Eastern Michigan’s football renaissance will last until it plays a real, live FBS opponent- in other words, next week when the Eagles travel to Ann Arbor to take on Michigan. If and when Ron English’s team comes to earth, at least there won’t be too many people around to see it. His team’s victories over Howard and Alabama State were witnessed by a total of 8,334 spectators at Rynearson Stadium in Ypsilanti.

Winners of the Week

Washington State: Break up the Cougars. They’re 2-0 for the first time since 2005 after body-slamming UNLV on the Palouse, 59-7. After going 5-32 the last three seasons, with most of those losses one-sided affairs, Wazzou has outscored its first two opponents by a collective 123-28. Granted, those two opponents were Idaho State (one of the worst teams in FCS football) and UNLV- but if Paul Wulff’s team is blowing out anyone, that’s progress.

Oklahoma: Bob Stoop’s team established a milestone despite not playing this past weekend. The Sooners moved to the top of the Associated Press poll for the one-hundredth time, a new college football record. Of course, their stay might be a brief one, what with a road trip to Tallahassee to play fifth-ranked Florida State on Saturday.

Arizona State: Despite blowing a two-touchdown lead in the fourth quarter the Sun Devils knocked off Missouri 37-30 in overtime in front of a “Black-Out” crowd Friday night in Tempe. ASU led 30-16 early in the final period before giving up two unanswered touchdowns, the first set up by a fumbled punt. Missouri even had a chance to win at the gun, but Grant Ressel missed a 48-yard field-goal attempt and the Devils took advantage, scoring the winning touchdown in the extra session on Brock Osweiler’s touchdown strike to Jamal Miles. Now 2-0 and ranked 22^nd in the latest AP poll, the Sun Devils head into a rough two-game stretch in which they travel to Illinois and host USC, a team they’ve lost eleven straight against.

Vanderbilt: Robbie Caldwell’s Commodores have already won as many games as they did in both 2009 and 2010, moving to 2-0 with a come-from-behind 24-21 victory over Connecticut. Trailing 21-14 midway through the fourth, Vandy ripped off the last ten points on a 50-yard pick-six by Casey Heyward and a field goal by former Mayfield Wildcat Carey Spear. With shaky Ole Miss coming to Nashville next week, the Commodores have a chance to get to 3-0 before the schedule gets vicious, with back-to-back roadies at South Carolina and at Alabama.

David Shaw and Steve Addazio: Jim Harbaugh and Al Golden might be tough acts to follow, but these two head coaches are doing just fine so far. Shaw has sixth-ranked Stanford sitting at 2-0 after a road rout of Duke, while Addazio has Temple flying out of the gate at 2-0 with wins over Villanova and Akron by a combined score of 83-10. Both departed coaches left the cupboards relatively full, so it remains to be seen if Shaw or Addazio can keep things rolling into the future. But for now there’s been no drop-off from either the Cardinal or Owls.

Losers of the Week

Georgia: Bad teams find ways to lose winnable games, and right now, in the wake of their 45-42 loss to South Carolina in Athens, the Bulldogs are a bad team. They touched up the Cock defense for 436 total yards and four Aaron Murray touchdown passes but had that prolific effort negated by three touchdowns scored by Carolina’s defense and special teams- including a 68-yard jaunt with a fake punt by 275-pound defensive end Melvin Ingram. It’s the first 0-2 start for the Georgia program since 1996, and it has Mark Richt in boiling water with a fan base that expects a whole lot more than what it’s getting right now.  

Minnesota: The Gopher program hasn’t had many good weeks over the last few years, but last Saturday was particularly egregious. Not only did they lose at TCF Bank Stadium to a New Mexico State team that took a twelve-game road losing streak into the proceedings, they also suffered a scary moment when first-year head coach Jerry Kill collapsed with a seizure in the final seconds. Kill, who has suffered two other seizures during his coaching career, looks as if he’s going to be alright- but the same can’t be said for his team, unfortunately.

Big East Football: The Least continued its tradition of losing to pretty much every non-conference opponent with a pulse. Louisville fell at home to Florida International; Connecticut lost at Vanderbilt; Cincinnati was beaten up by Tennessee in Knoxville, and Rutgers lost to North Carolina in Chapel Hill. Even the winners looked suspect: Syracuse had to hang on at home against Rhode Island, Pitt barely fought off Maine and West Virginia trailed Norfolk State at halftime before exploding to a 55-12 rout. Only South Florida looked truly good in its 37-7 blistering of Ball State.

Akron: In last week’s column I mentioned in passing that lesser teams than Ohio State would dominate the Zips this season. Right on cue, the Temple Owls came into InfoCision Stadium- AKA the White Elephant of Exchange Street- and laid a 41-3 whipping on Rob Ianello’s team, which has now been outscored 83-3 on the season. Akron plays Virginia Military Institute in two weeks. That might be the only real chance the Zips have of winning a game this season.

Kent State: New coach, same old Flashes. Darrell Hazell’s team fell to 0-2 on the season with a 20-12 loss in Dix Stadium to Louisiana-Lafayette, a team that went 3-9 in 2010. Kent’s stout defense held the Rajun’ Cajuns to 159 total yards, but nine penalties and four turnovers doomed the Flashes. UL-Lafayette’s two touchdowns came on a 63-yard interception return and a drive that started at the Kent one-yard line courtesy of a fumble. Some teams- like Georgia- are relative novices at the art of finding ways to lose. Kent State is a veritable grandmaster at it.

Next: The Buckeyes travel to South Florida to take on the Miami Hurricanes, Saturday night at 7:30. Uh-oh…