Written by Chris Hutchison

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Week 4 – Cleveland vs Cincinnati

As I was writing this article, there was a common theme to a lot of the players I was discussing.

Peyton Hillis.  TJ Ward.  Joe Haden.  Scott Fujita.  Seneca Wallace.  Ben Watson.  Tony Pashos.

The theme is that they were all acquired in the 2010 offseason by Tom Heckert.

Additionally, but for injuries, I have no doubt I would be speaking warmly of Montario Hardesty and Shawn Lauvao as well.

If I were forced - under pain of watching The Bachelor - to name the "Keepers" on this team not acquired by Heckert, I would give you Lawrence Vickers, Joe Thomas, Alex Mack, Josh Cribbs, Ahtyba Rubin, Marcus Benard, and Matt Roth.  That's it.  Seven lousy players.  Holy Crapfest, Batman!

Six plus years of player acquisition yielding just 7 players that are current or future "difference makers" is a sad, sad song, especially when I can probably name 7 from this offseason alone.  Here, let me try:  Ward, Hillis, Haden, Fujita, Watson, Hardesty, Lauvao.

Hardesty and Lauvao are, of course, question marks since we haven't seen them play, but from what I did see, I feel that only injury misfortune will keep them from success.

Competent Front Office leadership can right a ship in a damn hurry.  If Heckert can duplicate the 2010 progress in 2011 (a tall order with the impending labor situation), then suddenly this is a team with playmakers.  Suddenly, the Talent Gap will have closed.

There is no doubt that a Talent Gap exists.  This was evident again on Sunday, as the Browns had to physical their way to a lead and hold on as the more talented team made their run.  The only option was to out-tough the (classically considered) "better" team.  You can't do that every week.  That's a hard row to hoe.

So what we're watching is the Genesis of a Real Team - under-talented but not untalented, beginning to become physical, starting to become tough, solid running attack, trying to be opportunistic on Defense.  A team that is evolving into something that does not appear based on the New England model, the Seattle model, or the Philadelphia model.

No, this team looks more like the Pittsburgh and Baltimore model.  And it's not as far off as you might think.  A year, maybe two.  Close enough to continue to watch and squint for progress.

If you can't beat 'em, join 'em.  Then beat 'em when they're not looking.  Or drunk.

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Game Recap

The Browns and that other team (allegedly) from Ohio swapped a couple drives, until Kenyon Coleman recovered a fumbled handoff at about midfield with around 5 minutes left in the 1st.  Cleveland got a FG out of that, then tacked on a TD in the 2nd after an 87 yard drive was capped by a gorgeous-mous pass from Seneca Wallace to Evan Moore right down the middle.  Browns 10, Bengals 0.

However, in Browns tradition, no good play goes unpunished, so, after allowing a Cincy FG, Sheldon Brown fell on his face while guarding TO in a one-on-one situation along the sidelines, which resulted predictably in a 78 yard TD.  At the end, Owens spelled the word "to" with his arms, which he apparently learned how to spell last week just in case of such a situation.  Browns 10, Bengals 10.

Wallace was picked on the next drive after Chansi Stucky botched the "catch", and it looked like another collapse was in full effect.  But Scott Fujita blocked a 44 yard Cincy FG try, and the Browns managed to drive far enough to get a FG of their own right before the Half.  Browns 13, Bengals 10.

Operation Smasheroo began in the 2nd Half, with the Browns driving 66 yards for a TD capped by a Peyton Hillis run, one of several on the drive that underlined his love of physical contact.  Carson Palmer was sacked and fumbled a few plays later, and that turnover resulted in another CLE FG, leaving the Browns with an uncomfortably comfortable lead.  Browns 23, Bengals 10.

In an attempt to alleviate the pressure, the Bengals went to a no-huddle Offense, and it worked for a while.  They drove 76 yards for a FG and 80 yards for a TD on consecutive leads (helped by a personal foul call on TJ Ward for - to paraphrase Chris Tucker in Friday - knocking Jordan Shipley the F out).  Browns 23, Bengals 20.

Watching the Browns lose three 4th Quarter leads in three weeks didn't instill the fans with a ton of faith (not to mention the last 10 years of blown saves), and when Cleveland went 3 and Out with about 9 1/2 left in the 4th, you heard more cheer at a Siberian funeral.  The Bengals drove, looking good, looking like at least a FG was inevitable, until Chad Johnson picked up an Offensive Pass Interference penalty on 3rd Down at the 31 (saving a Joe Haden pick) and Matt Roth sacked Palmer from behind on the subsequent play, forcing Cincy back out of FG position and the punt.

With about 4 1/2 left, Headmaster Hillis (PHD of Smash) calmly pounded out the yardage required to run out the clock.

Final:  Browns 23, Bengals 20.

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Conclusion

Time of Possession:  Cleveland – 30:46, Cincinnati – 29:14

Total Yards:  Cincinnati – 413, Cleveland - 295

First Downs:  Cincinnati - 21, Cleveland – 21

These numbers clearly indicate that the Browns played ball control while the Bengals opted for a more big-play quick-strike approach, which makes sense considering Cincy falling behind 23-10 in the 2nd Half.

Despite the differing styles, I'm also convinced that the Browns and Bengals are on fairly equal ground.  Cincy has more household names, but some of them are overrated/past-their-prime, and they have their share of weaknesses too.  They are more talented individually, but, in football, that does not always translate to a superior Team.

Sadly, I do not conclude that the Browns being on par with the Bengals constitutes that the Browns have arrived.  No, it just means that Cincy is an overrated team that is really of middle-of-the-pack quality, and will continue to be exposed as thus throughout the season despite a good win here or there.

The AFC North is still a 2 team division, and neither of those teams wear orange.

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Gameballs

TJ Ward – Keep on a-rockin' 'em, baby.

Matt Roth – 2 sacks, one in the most important of moments near the end.  Finally developing back into the pass rushing threat he was at the end of last season.

Peyton Hillis - Brian McPeek dubbed him Hammer (or was it Nails?), and it's more fun than a closet full of hookers to watch him run.  He didn't really rack up the yards on Sunday, but the body count was nice.  I noticed at least a couple defenders pretending like they really needed to tie their shoe when he started coming their way.

Scott Fujita – Blocking the FG was nice, but so was the sack and the forced fumble.

Kenyon Coleman – Just when I thought he was dead, he showed up on the field and actually made some plays.  3 tackles, 1 sack, 2 fumble recoveries - nicely played, sir.

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Honorable Mention

Chansi Stuckey – And we have a WR sighting!  Would've been higher, but that pick was all his culpa.

Joe Haden – He gave up some plays, true.  But he was physical and didn't let up and doesn't get down.  Nothing but high hopes for this guy.

Ben Watson – Once again highly effective, and just this close to a spectacular TD catch.

Tony Pashos – They ran well to the right, and that's the kind of balance we need.

Seneca Wallace – Once again solid if unexciting.  A great throw here and there, mixed with a lot of meh.  But oh-so much better than what we had at QB last year that, in comparison, his play is like watching Van Gogh paint.

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Well, At Least You Didn't Wet Yourself

Eric Wright – Hardly a quality game, but of so much higher quality than his last game that I do have some hope he might recover mentally.  Needs to continue to be more physical, and, if he does make a good play, needs to continue to be a show-off ass about it.  If you were an ass before, then a return to ass means you've recovered your confidence.

Or it might just mean you're an ass.  Too close to call.

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Wall of Shame

Mo Massaquoi & Brian Robiskie – Did you gentlemen make a joke at Seneca's wife's expense?  Did you put some compromising photos of her on the internet?  Send her some suggestive haiku?  Or do you just have no business playing the WR position at this level?

Sheldon Brown – The asterisk to Heckert's quality talent acquisition.  You can't fall in a situation like that (the 78 yard TD catch).  Did you happen into a hyper-gravity zone?  Turf monster?  Random squirrel (like the one that stopped John Elway)?

Abe Elam – Because there's only one Safety I know who's even on the field, and it ain't Abe.

Brian Daboll – Did you forget that the Browns had more than one Running Back on the roster?

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Much ado has been made about TJ Ward's hit on Jordan Shipley in the 4th Quarter.  Some (like the Bengals) call it a cheap shot.  Some call it legal.  There has been plenty of speculation if the hit was late, did he know the ball was out, did his shoulder hit the helmet, was there helmet to helmet, was it malicious intent, etc. etc. yada yada yada.

Here's what I know about the hit:  TJ Ward jacked that guy up.

Our guys are usually getting lit, not doing the lighting.  We might complain about it half-heartedly, but what we really feel is envy for the team that has guys that will nail you and intimidate you.  A fair example is Ndamukong Suh tossing Delhomme around during the Preseason.  Sure, it was illegal, but I'll be damned if that didn't make me want Suh on my team all the more.

Obviously, rules are rules, and if you violate them enough it hurts the team.  But the rules have become so over-protective that I've heard the NFL is considering re-naming itself the National Pansy-Ass League.  If you're an old-school defender and you're trying to send an old-school message, it'll probably cost ya 15 yards.

That don't mean the message shouldn't be sent.

The message here was "If you should happen to get up, think twice before you come across the middle again.  And that goes for the rest of you, too."

Finally we've got a defender that teams will talk about beforehand.  So what if some of the talk is vindictive?  You think Ray Lewis was universally loved?

So Bravo, Mr. Ward.  Keep it up.  The way you play, I don't need to see your number to know it's you making the tackle.  I could tell from Mars.

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I love Peyton Hillis.  I do. 

And since I made the wise decision to trade POS for Hillis in my fantasy league, I love him even more (anything to get POS off my team - couldn't stomach the idea of actually rooting for him to do well).

But I don't think that Hillis is a Franchise RB.

He can have a large role.  He can be part of a committee.  But every single gol-dang carry?

No, that's not smart.  And it only hastens him getting burnt-out/hurt.

Yet the other RB's on the team had absolutely zero carries.  Cribbs had a few, but the Browns really never gave Hillis a breather, and it's not like Jerome Harrison is completely useless.

I remember this happened a lot at the end of last year.  In the Steelers game, Harrison didn't get going early, Chris Jennings had a couple nice runs, and Jerome never saw the field again.

The next week was just the opposite.

I understand the concept of "riding the hot hand", but pounding your RB's into the dirt is just not a smart game plan.  Not to mention that the team might just benefit from a change-up back here or there - especially in a situation where you can pound 'em with Hillis then throw Harrison in there for a swing at the fences.

But, I get the sense that the coaching staff will ride the Hillis Train as far as they can, and they, for whatever reason, really aren't big fans of Harrison or Davis.  What they wanted was a Hardesty-Hillis dynamic duo, but that's on hold for a little while.

So, to sum up:  Love Peyton Hillis.  But he needs some breaks.

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It appears that Jake Delhomme will finally be healthy enough this week to resume his starting role, and he should.

I don't subscribe to the concept that you don't lose your job to injury.  Of course you do.  It happens every day.  If a QB gets hurt and the backup comes in and clearly plays better than the starter was, then the starter becomes the backup and vice versa.

The examples are strewn throughout history, from Tom Brady taking over for Drew Bledsoe to Mike Vick taking over for Kevin Kolb.  Both coaches were right to make the decisions they did - you ride the hot hand.

However, I don't see that situation here in Cleveland.  Seneca Wallace played fairly well out there, but it's not like he was Brady or even Vick.  And Delhomme was playing pretty well too before he injured his ankle on the bonehead INT in Tampa.

If one guy isn't clearly outperforming another, then you stick with the guy that you originally installed as the starter.

Not to mention that putting Jake back in the lineup might be a proverbial electrified nipple-clamp for the Wide Receivers.  Jake seems to look towards Robiskie and, in particular, Massaquoi more than Seneca does.

Worst comes to worst... you yank 'im.

If Wallace were lighting the NFL world on fire, then that would be one thing.  But I don't see how inserting Delhomme back as the starting QB severely hampers the Browns' chances of winning in any way, especially seeing as they're devoted to the power running game and stubbornly refuse to use Seneca in any kind of running packages at all.

So, welcome back, Mr. Delhomme.  Welcome back, welcome back, welcome back.

I guess.

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This may come as blasphemy, but I don't think the WR corps is that bad.

-GASP!-

Stuckey is a decent slot guy.  Mo Mass can be a decent #2.  Evan Moore is a decent possession pseudo-receiver.  Josh Cribbs is a nice wrench to throw in the enemy's works.

Robiskie is... well, I'm trying hard to convince myself he's not completely useless, and it's not really taking.

So, to transform this WR unit from so-putrid-I-retch-at-its-sight to not-too-freakin'-bad, it just needs one guy.

Unfortunately, that guy would be a #1 Receiver.  The kind that's a valuable commodity.  The kind you rarely get in Free Agency.  The kind you rarely get to trade for.

(And don't say Braylon Edwards to me.  Edwards wasn't, isn't, and never will be a #1 caliber WR.)

This means that - yes - Heckert better start scouting the top WR's in the 2011 draft class, cuz we're gonna have to get one high.

(High in the draft, not "get him high".  He's probably already high.)

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I feel sorry for Lee Evans.

I don't know where that came from, but I just do.  His career rotting away on that team... with those QB's... breaks the heart, it does.

Maybe we can trade for him?  Bills seem to be having a fire sale.

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I encountered more than one individual who expressed skepticism about my status as ordained minister, so I would just like to present this incontrovertible proof that my tale was, indeed, truth.

That's me in the middle, the one with minimal to zero hair on his head.

As far as you know.

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Next Up

Atlanta Falcons (2-1). 

Tarnation, I really wanna call this one a Browns win too.  I think they CAN take this game, but they can lose it just as easily.  This isn't a great matchup.

Atlanta has the 6th ranked Offense, 10th in passing (Cleveland's Achilles heel right now).  Matt Ryan is - at this point - probably better than Carson Palmer.  The Falcons also have a solid running game with Mike Turner, so the D will have its hands full.

They also have the 11th ranked rush Defense, which will help counteract the Browns' strength (the category CLE is highest in is Rush Offense, at 14th).

In fact, the Falcons are higher in every single statistical category than the Browns.  And they have more talent too.

But the Browns are playing on home, and if the weather is shitty they can definitely take the Birds down.

Not putting money on it this week, however.

Falcons 27, Browns 20.

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Thing That I Dislike More Than Aaron Goldhammer

ESPN's Preseason NBA Coverage

I am not dumb.  Well, not completely dumb.  So, yes, I know why ESPN does it.  I know that they created this monster, and now they need to hype it to freakin' death so the world eats up every morsel.

They tell US what WE want to see.  Our job is to agree.

But if I have to hear about the Miami Heat's daily walkthrough one more time I will lose my freakin' mind.  I don't care what LeBron's beard looked like or how shiny Wade's sneakers were or how pink Chris Bosh's tutu was.  I don't wanna hear anything more about that team.  If the earth were to open up and swallow the whole damn state of Florida whole, I want it to be nothing more than a blurb at the end of the Sportscenter, something like "In other news, the Heat's preseason game was cancelled tonight because everyone in Miami is dead.  Next - Brett Favre responds to Rex Ryan!"

The time has come for some serious alternative sports news programming.  There's only so much NFL Network I can watch before everything's a repeat.