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Mitch Cyrus24_Episode_18

A day late and a dollar short, is the old expression.  Well, this column is a day late as my normal routine was thrown off due to a business trip that saw me getting back home just in time to watch Game 5 of the Cavaliers-Bulls series.  And if you think I was missing that to watch this tripe…you’ve got a worse drinking problem then I do.

But this series isn’t a “dollar short”.  It just doesn’t have any cents/sense.

Thank you.  I’ll be here all week.  Try the veal.

So this begins the six episodes that were filmed after taking a break for Kiefer Sutherland’s surgery.  Hopefully during the break, the writers all underwent surgeries, and their moronoscopies were all successful, and we can perhaps have a decent ending.

And perhaps that Powerball I purchased while getting enough beer to get me through this episode will win me $200 million.


Mitch CyrusCrystalballAnother totally blah movie weekend.  Lucky for us sports fans, no one is paying attention to the movies this weekend when you have the NFL draft and the Cavaliers looking to rebound on Sunday.

I must say that so far, 2010 has been a major disappointment at the theater.  So far, there has been only one movie released this year that I consider “good”, and that’s “Shutter Island”.  The rest have been OK at best (“Book of Eli”, “Green Zone”), and horrible at worst (“Clash of the Titans”).

I’d like to say that I think it will get better, but that would be lie.  I’m looking at the upcoming Summer Blockbusters, and it’s as lackluster of a season as I’ve seen since I started writing here.  When looking at the big movies coming out over the next four months, there are only three that truly interest me; “Iron Man 2”, which looks to be popcorn fun at its finest, “Robin Hood”, with Ridley Scott and Russell Crowe hopefully recapturing their magic from “Gladiator”, and “Inception”, another Christopher Nolan mind bender with Leonardo DiCaprio.  The rest?  Lame remakes, lame video game adaptations, and moronic comedies.

Mini Review – Pirate Radio

This will probably be the shortest mini-review in the brief history of this segment.


Mitch CyrusJack_BauerIt’s been awhile since I’ve had guest commentary in here, but Gary Benz has once again showed that not only is he a very talented writer with a firm grasp on All Things Cleveland Sports…he’s also one sick individual with a mind as warped as a cheap 2 x 4 left out in a monsoon for a month.

This week, Gary contemplates the fate of the newly departed (but not yet dead) BubbaHastings.  Like me, Gary is a sneaking suspicion that we haven’t yet seen the last of the former head of CTU, and that he may have to come back to fill his Lt. Dan destiny of dying in service to his country…or in service to his writers, which would really suck.

Once that’s completed, Gary suggests that he can perhaps duplicate his feat from Forrest Gump, and be the driving force behind the opening of BubbaHastings Unshrimp Restaurants, that would be CTU themed.  You go in, and every time you give the “analyst/waitress” your order, she invariably says “dammit”.  If you are really lucky, there will be a random analyst/waitress that is a mole for a rival restaurant, and instead of bringing you a BauerBurger, she instead brings you shrimp scampis.  And just for fun, at least three people at any table of more than six have to die.

This is a wonderful idea with one glaring problem:  No one in “24” ever eats.


I come to praise Renee, not to bury her.  But I am still totally pissed at the “leadership” of those at “24” for the decision to kill her off.


Mitch CyrusCrystalball

Back in the saddle again.  Not much was really missed here last week.  Only one movie opened nationwide, the Steve Carrel/Tina Fey comedy “Date Night”, which opened as number one…barely.  I expect this film to drop off the radar very quickly, as it has been described by most as “amusing, but nowhere close to hilarious”.

Only two new movies coming out this week, but one of them is getting a huge amount of positive buzz (yeah, we’ve heard that before, haven’t we?)

Mini Review – An Education

This was a very strange year for me, as it was the first year since I’ve been writing for TheClevelandFan that I had not seen all of the movies nominated for the Best Picture Oscar prior to the awards telecast.  A lot of that had to do with the fact that there were ten films nominated, so it was difficult to get out to see all of them.


Mitch Cyrus24_Episode_14Welcome Back

My apologies for having missed placing this column last week, as circumstances beyond my control found me out of town.  Frankly, I don’t think I could have picked a better week to miss, as this was an excruciating two hours, with the exception of a very interesting twist at the end.  So before we move on to this week’s episode, let’s touch base on what happened last week.

6 – 8 AM Summary

We really only had three main points to the entire two hours;  discovering the bomb/dealing with traitors, the Dana Situation, and the Trial of Hassan

Bombs Away! (or maybe not)

As opposed to the whole awful Dana plot line that is like a chainsaw carrying Energizer Rabbit Zombie, and keeps going and going and going, killing brain cells along the way…The RobWeasel/Gen. Turdisdumb Conspiracy Group had as much shelf life as a late innings relief pitcher for the Cleveland Indians.


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